How To Help a Grieving Relative Avoid Exploitation
How to gently protect a family member who is bereaved from the scammers and opportunists who target people in grief.
Last reviewed: 1 June 2026
Grief creates vulnerability. People who are recently bereaved may be less able to scrutinise unusual requests, more susceptible to emotional appeals, and preoccupied with practical matters — all of which fraudsters can exploit. Protecting a grieving relative does not require taking over their affairs; it means being present, attentive, and willing to help them pause before making significant decisions.
Know who tends to exploit bereavement
Understanding the types of opportunism that follow a death makes it easier to spot and gently name them.
- Unofficial estate clearance services that offer low prices and pressure for a quick decision
- Scammers posing as unknown creditors of the deceased, claiming debts must be paid immediately
- Investment or will-writing advisers who approach without being asked
- Fake friends or acquaintances who become unusually attentive and request money or gifts
- Phishing attempts that use the deceased's name or accounts
Create a buffer for major decisions
One of the most protective things a family can offer is agreement that no significant financial decision needs to be made immediately.
- Establish a shared rule: nothing significant is agreed to within the first month without family discussion
- Offer to be present for any meetings with advisers, solicitors, or officials
- Agree that any unexpected caller about the estate is told to write rather than call back
- Help manage correspondence so nothing slips through unreviewed
Support emotional wellbeing as part of scam protection
Loneliness, isolation, and a desire to rebuild connection are genuine needs that fraudsters — particularly romance and friendship scammers — deliberately target.
- Regular contact from family reduces the window for outsiders to fill
- Encourage connection with community and social groups where appropriate
- Be alert to new intense friendships that appeared after the bereavement and quickly involve financial requests
- Create space for the grieving person to talk about anyone they have been speaking to
Conversation script
“You have so much to deal with right now — I just want to make sure nobody takes advantage. Would it be okay if I helped you go through any post or calls that feel uncertain?”
“One thing we could agree on is that nothing big has to be decided right now. Anyone legitimate will be happy to wait a few weeks.”
“If anyone new comes into your life who seems very interested very quickly, it is always okay to mention them to me first before getting too close.”
Frequently asked questions
What if the grieving relative resents being protected?
Frame help as practical rather than protective. Offering to 'help with the paperwork' or 'be there for the meeting' is usually better received than raising concerns about scams directly. Respecting autonomy while staying present is the right balance.
Can the deceased person's accounts be used in a scam even after death?
Yes — fraudsters sometimes continue to use email or social media accounts belonging to deceased people. These accounts should be memorialised or closed as soon as reasonably possible after death.