How To Help Someone Who Is Being Scammed
Support a loved one who is currently being scammed — including when they don't believe you.
Last reviewed: 1 June 2026
Helping someone mid-scam is delicate, especially when manipulation has them defending the scammer. Patience, empathy, and practical steps work better than confrontation.
If they're open to help
When someone recognises they're being scammed and wants help, speed matters more than anything else, so move through the practical steps together immediately rather than dwelling on how it happened. Call the bank's fraud line directly — not a number the scammer provided — to freeze transfers and dispute recent payments while there's still a chance of reversal. Change passwords on any account the scammer may have accessed, starting with email, since it's usually the gateway to everything else. Report the scam to the relevant national fraud reporting service so there's an official record, which can matter for refunds and later investigations. Stay with them through this rather than sending instructions to do it alone; the reassurance matters as much as the actions.
- Help them stop contact and stop payments
- Contact their bank together using official numbers
- Preserve evidence and report it
If they don't believe you
Scammers deliberately build intense trust over weeks or months, often positioning themselves as the one person who truly understands the victim, so it's common for someone to defend the scammer even when shown clear evidence. Arguing or presenting proof aggressively tends to make people dig in further, because it forces them to choose between you and the relationship they've invested in emotionally. Instead, ask open questions that let them notice inconsistencies themselves — 'Has he ever video-called you?' or 'Why does the money always need to go through this one method?' — rather than declaring 'this is obviously fake.' Keep showing up without ultimatums; most people eventually see it, and you want to still be trusted when they do.
- Stay calm and avoid 'I told you so'
- Ask questions that encourage them to verify independently
- Suggest a pause: 'just don't pay anything until we check together'
- Involve their bank, which can apply protections
Conversation script
“I'm not angry and I'm not judging — I just want to help you check this is safe.”
“Could we pause any payments for 24 hours and verify together?”
“Let's call the bank on the official number and ask them, just to be sure.”
Frequently asked questions
They trust the scammer more than me — what do I do?
This is common with manipulation. Don't force a confrontation; encourage independent verification, involve their bank (which can apply protections), and keep the relationship supportive so they'll turn to you when doubt sets in.