Romance 'Help Me Pay Customs on a Gift' Scam Examples
An online romantic contact you've been messaging, often for weeks or months without meeting in person, says they've sent you a valuable gift or package that is now stuck at customs, and asks you to pay a release or clearance fee to get it delivered. Both the relationship and the gift are fabricated, built specifically to create emotional investment before the money request arrives. Once one fee is paid, further fees for taxes, insurance, or unlocking typically follow. The scammer's goal is a series of payments sustained by emotional attachment. Never send money to someone you have only met online, regardless of the reason given.
Last reviewed: 1 June 2026
Sanitized example messages
Illustrative, sanitized examples. Personal details are replaced with placeholders such as [phone number] and [fake link].
Darling, I sent you a beautiful gift but it is stuck at customs. They are asking for [amount] to release it. Can you help just this once?
I am so sorry — the package I sent from [country] has been held. If you pay the customs fee of [amount] I will pay you back when I arrive.
My gift for you is at the border post. I cannot access money from here. A small fee of [amount] will get it released. Please help.
The courier is asking for a release payment of [amount]. I will repay you when we finally meet. Please do this for us.
What the scammer wants
To extract money under the guise of a customs fee, with the 'gift' and the 'relationship' both being entirely fabricated. Each payment leads to a new fee demand.
Red flags in the message
- You have never met this person in real life
- They claim to be overseas or in a remote location unable to access funds
- A 'gift' you did not ask for is being sent
- Each payment leads to a new request for another fee
- They ask for wire transfer, cryptocurrency, or gift cards rather than a refund
- Any refusal to video-call in real time
A safe response
Do not send money. No legitimate customs or courier service will contact a recipient to pay a release fee — these are always paid by the sender. Stop contact and seek support.
What not to send
- Wire transfer or bank payments
- Gift card codes
- Cryptocurrency
What to do if you already replied
- Stop all contact with the person immediately
- Contact your bank to report the transfer and explore recall options
- Reach out to a support line for romance scam survivors — you are not at fault
Evidence to preserve
- Screenshot the full message or call details
- Note the sender number, email, or profile
- Save any links (without clicking) and payment details
- Record dates and times
Frequently asked questions
We've been talking for months and they've never asked for money before — doesn't that make this different?
Building trust over a long period before making any money request is actually a common, deliberate pattern in these scams, designed to make the eventual request feel reasonable. A long relationship history doesn't make a sudden customs fee request any more legitimate.
I already paid the customs fee — should I pay the next fee they're asking for to finally get the gift?
No, stop paying — this pattern of one fee leading to another is a strong sign that no real gift or package exists. Treat any money already sent as likely unrecoverable and do not send further payments chasing it.
Can I find out if this person is really who they say they are?
Try a reverse image search on their profile photos, which often reveals they're stolen from someone else's real account, and be cautious of anyone who avoids video calls or always has excuses not to meet. A refusal to verify their identity over time is a strong warning sign.
I've sent quite a bit of money over the relationship — can any of it be recovered?
Recovery may depend heavily on the payment method used — contact your bank directly if you used a traceable method like a card or bank transfer, though wire transfers and gift cards are generally very hard to reverse. Reporting the scam to your bank and relevant fraud authorities is still worthwhile.