Is a romance match I met online who is now asking me to send money a scam?
Yes, almost certainly. Someone you have never met in person asking for money — regardless of the reason given — is the defining behaviour of a romance scam.
Last reviewed: 10 June 2026
Explanation
Romance scams begin with a convincing online persona, typically on a dating app, social media, or even a gaming platform. The scammer builds genuine emotional intimacy over days or weeks before an emergency arises: a medical crisis, a business deal gone wrong, travel costs to come and meet you, or a lucrative investment opportunity they want to share. Every request for money is accompanied by a plausible story and reassurances of love.
Scammers operate from scripts refined over years and often manage multiple victims simultaneously. The photos they use are stolen from real people, and reverse-image searching the profile pictures is one of the fastest ways to identify a fake account. AI-generated images are increasingly used and are harder to detect this way.
The requests start small and escalate. Each payment is followed by another crisis requiring more money. Victims sometimes send tens of thousands of dollars before realising what is happening. When you stop sending money, the relationship ends abruptly — confirming what was really going on.
If your online partner has never video-called in real time, always has an excuse to avoid meeting in person, or seems too perfect to be true, treat these as serious warning signs. You deserve to have your feelings taken seriously, and the best way to protect yourself is to confirm the person is real before the relationship deepens.
Common red flags
- Never willing to video call in real time or always has camera problems
- Professes strong feelings very quickly — love-bombing early in the relationship
- Their profile photos match results from a reverse-image search of other people
- Always has a reason they cannot meet in person despite planning to
- First money request tied to an emotional emergency like medical bills or a stuck business payment
- Asks you to keep the relationship private or not discuss it with family
- Encourages you to invest in crypto or other assets through a platform they recommend
What to do now
- Stop sending money immediately and do not send any more regardless of the explanation
- Do a reverse-image search of their profile photos using Google Images or TinEye
- Tell a trusted friend or family member about the relationship to get an outside perspective
- Report the profile to the platform where you met them
- Report the scam to your national fraud agency or consumer protection body
- If you sent money recently, contact your bank to try to recall the payment
- Seek emotional support — being deceived in this way is genuinely distressing
Frequently asked questions
What if we have been talking for months and it feels very real?
Scammers invest months or even years in building relationships because the payoff is larger. The length of time does not confirm authenticity — consistent refusal to video call or meet in person is more meaningful than the duration.
Can the money I sent be recovered?
Recovery is difficult. Bank transfers and crypto payments are hard to reverse. Report immediately and ask your bank whether a recall is possible. Specialist recovery services that charge upfront fees are themselves often scams.
Is it my fault for being scammed?
No. These operations are run by professional fraudsters who exploit normal human needs for connection. Falling for a romance scam is not a sign of naivety; it is a sign that a skilled deceiver targeted you.